The Top 10 Songs About Mental Illness

While every music mag and blog is running their end-of-year Top 10 Best Album lists – for the record, my number-one is TV on the Radio’s “Seeds” – we here at The Bipolar Addict decided to count down the best songs that encapsulate the bipolar experience. With their telltale lyrics and moody vibes, these ten tracks epitomize our manic and depressive sides.

 1. “Lithium” — Nirvana

 

Nirvana – Lithium (1080 HD) from Nirvana on Vimeo.

“Lithium” is a thrill ride of emotions – with happiness and sadness highlighted sometimes within the same sentence.

Cobain writes that he is so happy to find his friends, they’re in his head – a categorical love letter to mania. Many of Cobain’s other songs — including “Frances Farmer” (depression) and “Radio Friendly Unit Shifter” (mania) — allude to bipolar feelings. But “Lithium” is most emblematic of the disease.

I’m so happy
‘Cause today I found my friends
They’re in my head
I’m so ugly
That’s OK ‘cause so are you
We broke our mirrors
…
I’m so lonely
That’s okay, I shaved my head
And I’m not sad
And just maybe
I’m to blame for all I’ve heard
And I’m not sure

I’m so excited
I can’t wait to meet you there
And I don’t care
I’m so horny
That’s okay, my will is good

I like it — I’m not gonna crack
I miss you — I’m not gonna crack
I love you — I’m not gonna crack
I killed you — I’m not gonna crack

2. “Manic Depression” – Jimi Hendrix

It’s unclear whether or not Jimi Hendrix was bipolar . He never talked about it in interviews, but he did write a song about it. “Manic Depression” epitomizes our disease with its poetic lyrics that shine a light on the struggle.

Music, sweet music
I wish I could caress
Manic depression’s a frustrated mess

Wishing to caress something as abstract as music is the kind of manic thinking one has while on the upswing. And for so many of us bipolar addicts, music is a saving grace, a source of comfort.

Manic depression is indeed a frustrated mess. It is known that Jimi did copious amounts of drugs including LSD, marijuana, cocaine, amphetamines, and heroin. “Well I think I’ll go and turn myself off and go on down / All the way down,” the song continues. Hendrix died in September of 1970 of asphyxiation, choking on his own vomit after taking barbiturates.

3.”Down In It” — Nine Inch Nails

Industrial-music mastermind Trent Reznor delivers this spine-tingling track, from 1991’s classic Pretty Hate Machine, that describes the ups and downs of bipolar to a T. Reznor has had suicidal thoughts and alcohol addiction. ­It is rumored that he is bipolar, but he hasn’t opened up about it.

Kinda like a cloud I was up, way up in the sky

And I was feeling some feelings you wouldn’t believe
Sometimes I don’t believe them myself
And I decided I was never coming down

Just then a tiny little dot caught my eye
It was
 just about too small to see

But I watched it way too long

It was pulling me down

I was up above it
I was up above it

Now I’m down in it

4. “Road to Joy” — Bright Eyes

Conor Oberst of Bright Eyes is arguably the greatest songwriter of my generation. His vivid, storytelling lyrics echo Bob Dylan. “Road to Joy” is über happy, and the character in the story is undoubtedly manic. It is unknown whether or not this song is autobiographical. Conor has never publicly admitted to having bipolar disorder.

I’m drinking, breathing, writing, singing
Every day I’m on the clock
My mind races with all my longings
But can’t keep up with what I got

That lyric encapsulates the feeling of mania. The hypercreativity. The racing thoughts. And later on, Conor screams, “I’m wide awake, it’s morning.” An overjoyed declaration after staying up all night, perhaps?

5. “Depression” – Black Flag

The legendary LA hardcore-punk band sums up depression in this less-than-three-minute nugget of a tune from the classic 1981 debut album, Damaged.

The lyrics are literal.

Right here, all by myself
I ain’t got no one else
The situation is bleeding me
There’s no relief for a person like me

Depression’s got a hold of me
Depression, I gotta break free
Depression’s got a hold on me
Depression’s gonna kill me

Everybody just get away
I’m gonna boil over inside today
They say things are gonna get better
All I know is they fuckin’ better

I ain’t got no friends to call my own
I just sit here all alone
There’s no girls that want to touch me
I don’t need your goddamn sympathy

6. “A Better Son or Daughter” — Rilo Kiley

The LA indie rockers nail it with this song, which practically bleeds bipolar disorder. I’ll let the words speak for themselves.

Sometimes in the morning I am petrified and can’t move

Awake but cannot open my eyes

And the weight is crushing down on my lungs

I know I can’t breathe

And hope someone will save me this time

And your mother’s still calling you insane and high

Swearing it’s different this time

And you tell her to give in to the demons that possess her

…

And sometimes when you’re on
You’re really fucking on
And your friends they sing along
And they love you

But the lows are so extreme
That the good seems fucking cheap
And it teases you for weeks in its absence
But you’ll fight and you’ll make it through
You’ll fake it if you have to
And you’ll show up for work with a smile
And you’ll be better
You’ll be smarter
More grown up and a better daughter or son
And a real good friend

And you’ll be awake
You’ll be alert
You’ll be positive though it hurts
And you’ll laugh and embrace all of your friends
And you’ll be a real good listener
You’ll be honest
You’ll be brave
You’ll be handsome and you’ll be beautiful
You’ll be happy

7. “Something Vague” — Bright Eyes

Another track from Conor Oberst essentializes  bipolar – this time on the depressive end of the spectrum. Bright Eyes’ 2000 album, Fevers and Mirrors, oozes with depression, contrasting his latter-day work, which is joyous and happy. Sleeping too much is one of the biggest signs of depression. And this song addresses that idea.

Now and again it seems worse than it is
But mostly the view is accurate
You see your breath in the air
As you climb up the stairs
To that coffin you call your apartment
And you sink in the chair
Brush the snow from your hair
And dream the cold away
And you’re not really sure what you’re doing this for
But you need something to fill up the days

8. “Institutionalized” — Suicidal Tendencies

A lot of us resist mental health treatment because we don’t want to be labeled “crazy.” I’ve never been committed to a psych ward, but from what I understand, we’ve come a long way since One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. The narrator in this hardcore-punk song believes he has no problem – an all-too-familiar sentiment among bipolar individuals who are manic. Frontman Mike Muir rambles at lightning speed, a sign of mania.

There’s always someone there going, hey, Mike

You know, we’ve been noticing

You’ve been having a lot of problems lately
You know, you should, maybe, get away

And like, maybe you should talk about it, you’ll feel a lot better
And I go, No, it’s OK, you know I’ll figure it out

Just leave me alone I’ll figure it out

You know I’ll just work it out myself
…
You’re gonna be institutionalized

You’ll come out brainwashed with bloodshot eyes

You won’t have any say
They’ll brainwash you until you see their way

I’m not crazy (institution
!)
You’re the one who’s crazy (institution
!)
You’re driving me crazy, (institution!)
They stuck me in an (institution!
)
Said it was the only solution

To give me the needed professional help
To protect me from the enemy, myself

9. “Hate Me” — Blue October

 

The Houston alt-rock band dips their toes into bipolar addiction in a song that addresses both sobriety and moods.

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don’t lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
…
There’s a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
…
I’m sober now for 3 whole months
It’s one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart
Is the one thing I won’t touch again

10. “Manic” — Plumb

Singer-songwriter Tiffany Arbuckle-Lee – stage name: Plumb – writes a song in which the chorus sums up mania quite authentically.

There’s a chemical in your brain
It’s pouring sunshine and in rage
You can never know what to expect
You’re manic, manic

What are your favorite songs that epitomize bipolar? List them in the comments and I will add them to my Bipolar Anthems Spotify playlist, which you can subscribe to here.